What code DOESN'T do...

moshpit

Resident Mac Hater
Just finished reading a particularly funny article about code in the movies and how different it is in real life. They hit on some really funny points that had me laughing as I remember thinking the same thing while watching these movies. This one had me laughing so hard I had tears running down my face...

"4. Code is not three dimensional
Remember in "hackers" when the gibson is depicted as a three dimensional city that the hackers must navigate through? Bullshit! We may use a dash of color in our shell to make things a bit clearer, but last I checked my terminal app doesn't require OpenGL. I'm working here, bitches - I'm not playing quake."

Hehehe, I remember thinking the same thing about the Gibson (I think it was supposed to be a Cray that they changed the name of...). I thought "Damn, that thing would be insane to try to admin..."
 
Another one that had me holding my sides to attempt to contain the laughter:

"5. Code does not make blip noises as it appears on the screen
This goes for ANY text, not just code. When text appears on my monitor it doesn't make blip sounds - this isn't 1902 (or whenever monitors used to do that).
This is one of the most common offenses in Hollywood films, almost every movie that has a scene where a character is composing an email or surfing the net has the text make blippity-blip sounds as it appears. Do they have any idea how fucking irritating that would be in real life? This article alone would be like thirty thousand blippity-blips."

Blippity blip blip...
 
does it have ones about clickity clackity keyboards and how everything is done with typing, even things that should be done with something other than a keyboard.
 
does it have ones about clickity clackity keyboards and how everything is done with typing, even things that should be done with something other than a keyboard.

It does mention that programmers do in fact use a mouse.
 
Personally I like a keyboard that has a bit of clack to the action. Like the old Cherry/Chicony keyboards, solid and built to last. Not like these cheap pieces of crap they make now.
 
Personally I like a keyboard that has a bit of clack to the action. Like the old Cherry/Chicony keyboards, solid and built to last. Not like these cheap pieces of crap they make now.

I hate them. I hate an old IBM PS/2 and it was too noisy for me. I have a ms natural pro and it's still too clackly for me. I one a keyboard where the keys don't make noises when I press them. :bleh:
 
i have never seen a movie that actually has accurate programming in it, because that would be far too boring. i do a bit of programming and actually enjoy it sometimes, but watching someone do it would put me to sleep.
 
i have never seen a movie that actually has accurate programming in it, because that would be far too boring. i do a bit of programming and actually enjoy it sometimes, but watching someone do it would put me to sleep.

instead of programming, they could do the planning meeting where you draw out the details of the program. that would be more accurate and probably less boring.
 
That's the problem tho, there IS no planning meeting in the movies, they all do this code on the fly off the top of their heads and seem to automatically know their organizational outline as if it was memorized already.
 
That's the problem tho, there IS no planning meeting in the movies, they all do this code on the fly off the top of their heads and seem to automatically know their organizational outline as if it was memorized already.

and then your boss (a business major), who learned how programming is done from the movies, repeatedly warns you about efficiency on the job and threatens to fire you for writing on the whiteboard instead of typing away at your keyboard.
 
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