What will do you if you are in my position?

Chuck

Chuck

Well-known member
So let's say "A" is the boyfriend of "B".

I met "B" two years ago, and she have been a real friendly and reliable to both me and my girlfriend.

I am building a real strong friendship with A, but just last week, he confessed all his troubles when he was piss drunk when we went out drinking.

Apparently, he said he is at least 500-600k in debt and am depressed out of his mind. Naturally, he is freaked out and don't want to take things overly serious with B because he thinks he can't afford to have a life.

Now I am stuck here. If I told B about what A told me in secret they will naturally break up. I know it's a friend's duty to keep secrets, but if I didn't tell B, I am allowing her to live miserably for the next 5 years.

Seriously guys. What will you do if you were me?
 
Tell A to stop being a db and tell everything to B.
Also I will never be in a similar situation as you. :bleh:
 
Chuck said:
So let's say "A" is the boyfriend of "B".

I met "B" two years ago, and she have been a real friendly and reliable to both me and my girlfriend.

I am building a real strong friendship with A, but just last week, he confessed all his troubles when he was piss drunk when we went out drinking.

Apparently, he said he is at least 500-600k in debt and am depressed out of his mind. Naturally, he is freaked out and don't want to take things overly serious with B because he thinks he can't afford to have a life.

Now I am stuck here. If I told B about what A told me in secret they will naturally break up. I know it's a friend's duty to keep secrets, but if I didn't tell B, I am allowing her to live miserably for the next 5 years.

Seriously guys. What will you do if you were me?
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It's not your problem to fix. Be supportive to your buddy and keep your trap shut. She'll find out soon enough.

The other part of that is that she just might *GASP!* fall in love with him anyway. Not everything revolves around money.
 
stay away from drama, you've got more than enough of that yourself.

As, Lazy said, you can be supportive, but it's their problem, they need to talk about it and try to fix it. You can't fix other peoples lives.

The more you get involved the higher the chance you're the @sshole at the end no matter how it plays out. (been there - done that, won't do again)

On a sidenote: I've really have no idea how someone can end up with half a mill debt.

As for the last part of falling in love, yes, possible, but let's be honest, in 9 outta 10 cases it will fail because of money problems (in a better world it wouldn't, i know, but we're not living in a better world) and other problems that WILL arise because of that. Personally i wouldn't even think about getting in a relationship before i've fixed my problems, but that might be just me, as usual.
 
He told you that **** in confidence and your idea of being a friend is to take that and immediately tell his significant other..

I think you need to re-evaluate your morals and ethics. Imagine a friend being in a sticky situation and you try to pile it on by throwing his business out there, and potentially make the situation even worse by making this person lonely; further pushing the depression to the edge.

Go ahead and tell "B", and when "A" puts a bullet in his head, you better take some responsibility for that ****.

Being a real friend would be helping him sort the issues out or encouraging him to tell "B" himself, not being a ****ing snitch.
 
Motivate your friend to come clean and seek help. That's the only position you are in.
 
I wouldn't tell B. That is not my place to do so, and she is going to find out one way or another anyway as you can't keep a massive debt like that secret for long.
 
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go have sex with "C"...



seriously, ask A to tell B... if he doesn't he's an a-hole... if you tell B you're a rat...

can't he claim bankruptcy and be clean in like 8 years...
 
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Nunz said:
He told you that **** in confidence and your idea of being a friend is to take that and immediately tell his significant other..

I think you need to re-evaluate your morals and ethics. Imagine a friend being in a sticky situation and you try to pile it on by throwing his business out there, and potentially make the situation even worse by making this person lonely; further pushing the depression to the edge.

Go ahead and tell "B", and when "A" puts a bullet in his head, you better take some responsibility for that ****.

Being a real friend would be helping him sort the issues out or encouraging him to tell "B" himself, not being a ****ing snitch.
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This. Snitches get stitches and end up in ditches.

Why the hell would you even consider telling B? You trying to have a backup in case you and your girl don’t work out? It’s the only reason I can think of as to why you’d fk over your “friend” like that.

One good thing to come out of this thread - I know who not to trust with any sensitive information.
 
Let me share a phrase that has saved me a lot of grief: “Not my circus. Not my monkeys.”
 
mizzer said:
Let me share a phrase that has saved me a lot of grief: “Not my circus. Not my monkeys.”
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...but he's asking for help... and cares for B... I like how he chose "B" for Boobies for the chick... coincidence, I think not...
 
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